Over the past few months, I have been saying that I am finally figuring out who I am and I am definitely liking that changes in my life. I saw this a few months ago and I think it says a lot about how I am feeling these past few months.
So, who have I finally realized I am? A friend asked me if I could put it one sentence what it be? I thought about it. I could say that I finally realized that I am physically strong. I could say that I am a runner. I could say that I can do so much more, in a physical sense, then I ever thought possible. I could say that I am energetic and happy. I could say that I am getting healthy. I could say that I realize that I can meet challenges of all different sorts. I can say that I am learning that I am fearless in many respect. I can say that I am enjoying life and finally living a life I deserve.
There are a lot of things I could say but none of them really say everything that I feel has been revealed to me in the last few months. My physical well being has improved dramatically and I know that. But I have figured out so much more about who I am.
I think I can sum it up in one sentence but it may need some explanation. My sentence is -- I am finally realizing that I am okay if I color outside the lines*. It is okay not to be perfect. It is okay to fail at times. It is okay to have moments where I may not reach my expectations. I can have bad days without thinking that it is the end of the world as I know it. I can ask for help. I can lean on people.
It is important to be resilient and I think I am. In fact, I am doing another stair climb this weekend. I am even going to be timed. I am going to do it because I like doing them....and it is okay that at times I color outside the lines.
*We spent some time with friends and their three year old girl the day after my stair climb melt down. At one point, the little girl started to cry because she wasn't a good "colorer". Tim, my ever insightful husband, asked me what was wrong with females...whether they be three or in their forties, they never do anything good enough...not good at coloring...not good at stair climbing.